Friday, January 27, 2017 @ 11:25 am

The things that I blurt out in the morning.
It threw my aunt into shock and she is currently launching a tirade of reasons why my thinking is wrong.

To be honest, I wonder when I started having such thoughts of wanting to move out, especially when things get tough sometimes and there are moments where I am brought back to the ten-year-old self who had to endure the shouts and screams at home.

But I guess now I know where I got my influence from. It is really so important to pick friends who dont just praise you but able to make you a better person.

How do you even manage to make it seem like everything is okay, things are good for you because of your decision? Facts are facts arent they- you left at the most crucial moment of their lives. If your betterment is at a huge expense of the ones who love you, I am not sure if this is considered a good decision?

I only say such things but I can never be this selfish. And this is me.

This is what defines me.

I have my wild artistic streak, I can be pretty eccentric. Sometimes I am crazy quiet, at other times I explode into this talkative mode that lasts for hours. I dream about many things but in the end, the things that anchor me are my own essence.

Things that I love or used to love, they all change. They are ephermeral. We have to go along with the times. But values, principles and core beliefs are pretty much rock solid. When lost, go back to the fundamentals of who you are and you'll know which are your heart's deepest desires, the wild fantasies and the worst of all- things that you simply follow others to look cool/mature/different.

Funny how adults get very freaked out by honest thoughts, but it is in recognising and acknowledging them that they can be transformed to something better.

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